You should never have to sit in a school meeting alone. You may bring an advocate, a friend or a family member — tell the school in advance, and do so every time.
Before the meeting
- Write down your top three concerns and what you want from the meeting. Say them at the start; do not wait for the agenda to reveal them.
- Ask what will be discussed, and ask for any documents in advance.
- Decide what “a good outcome” looks like in one sentence — an assessment, an adjustment, a written plan.
During the meeting
- Note decisions, not feelings: what was agreed, who will do it, by when.
- Note anything refused or “parked” — that is evidence too, and refusal in writing is often what triggers a better decision later.
- It is fine to say “let me read that back” or “can you send that in writing?”
After the meeting — the part that matters most
Within 48 hours, email the SENCO and everyone who attended a short summary: “Thank you for meeting me. Here is my understanding of what we agreed…” and end with “Please correct me by Friday if I have misunderstood anything.” If nobody corrects you, your notes stand as the record.
Families who do this consistently build the evidence trail that later wins assessments, plans and appeals. It costs nothing, and it changes who gets remembered.